What to Do when You Don't Get a Second Date

August 19, 2016

Inspired by the random discussion with a friend recently, how do you assure yourself a second date? And what to do when you don't get one?

Dating is supposed to be fun and exciting, however it can be that complicated to some people like me and you. So yes- there were times I pressured myself answering this question why the guy never called me back after the first date.

Ever had a three-hour date and you thought it was so great you were so sure he is going to message you after and ask you out again? He seemed to enjoy the conversation and was smiling the whole time! What could possibly go wrong?

Perhaps it was because I blabbered too much. Or didn't flash enough smile. Maybe I wore the wrong perfume that day, picked the wrong outfit when I should have worn one which could send some signals that "hey, you can bring me home and introduce me to your mama". Must be because my hair wasn't behaving well and flat. Or I could be running out of reasons and he simply just didn't like me at all. So what do you do?

He probably just got home after the date and is just composing a message to let you know how much he enjoyed the date (yeah, I'm trying to be positive here.)

Wait... or better yet, DON'T wait for his message
Just the mere act of waiting on something you got no control of can only make you nervous as you already are. Instead, go back to your routine before you had that date. Keep yourself busy. If he likes you, he won't let you wait. You are awesome and you should know it.
Don't take it too seriously
Not getting an invitation for a second date can bruise your ego. Man- it can hurt! But remember that you will only get hurt if you allow that person to hurt you. So pick up the pieces sooner than you think. If you are using a dating app to jump start meeting people and if you feel like going back to the ocean of potential dates and start swiping again, do it. If he happens to work in the same company, resist the urge to travel to his station and let your heart cry out.

You do realize that while he doesn't like you, there are one or two guys whom you said "No" in the past because you are not into them. So, quits lang.

One last thing, one bad date should never measure one's attractiveness. It just so happened that everyone looks for something and by chance you don't have it. But you definitely have something that others have been dying to have. Win-win situation.

So don't overthink, and instead be confident, approachable and genuine. The right guys you will attract and weed out the forgettable ones. Don't give up! And always remember to have fun!


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